Suicide is the single biggest cause of death for men under the age of 49 in the UK, with 84 men a week taking their own lives, some three times higher than women. The UK has seen its largest drop in suicide numbers than the past twenty years, however, universities have reported a record number of students completing suicide in recent years. This is then followed by the news that those students struggling with mental health problems in their first year has risen fivefold in ten years, not-withstanding those who did not speak out about it.
Though there are many varying risk factors associated with Suicide, 90% of those who completed Suicide had a history of Mental Illness in the year leading up to the event and so we are back to the topic of Mental Health and how we as a society, more importantly we as individuals, approach the subject and accept that things need to change, we need to change.
When we talk about Mental Health and Suicide, you cannot ignore the facts that the majority of us Men are guilty of not having the knowledge to recognise signs and symptoms associated with possible Stress or Depression, refusing to recognise the symptoms, refusing to accept that there are symptoms, hiding it from everyone and simply not talking!
Be honest now, be true to yourself, does this sound like you?
When I left the Army, I knew that things weren’t right, but by starting my first business, a Chauffeur company, I wanted to prove that those with a Mental Illness could not only compete with their peers, but work harder, be more productive and more successful. At the time I was unaware of the key thing to remember at all times, be kind to yourself.
The journey has been long, tiring, emotional and bloody hard, it is unlikely that my recovery journey will ever end, I have learned to manage symptoms on a daily basis through helpful coping strategies. That being said, recently I have regressed and those deep dark, scary thoughts have come back, I feel as though a small part of me dies every day I have them. As in this picture whilst life is flourishing all around, the tree with its broken branches and dying foliage is casting a lowly shadow. It makes no sense as the others are alive and colourful, yet for some reason, this one is struggling. Whilst I can appreciate the beauty of life that surrounds me, physically living that life can be at times exhausting, too exhausting.
You could argue that I failed, however, my only failure was refusing to accept the signs and do anything about them, instead I carried on working, resulting in my being taken into rehabilitation by Combat Stress and being a suicidal mess! Two years later I have been diagnosed with Complex PTSD, and moderate/severe Depression, which is further compounded by also having a degenerative disease disorder of the spine resulting in seven pro lapsed discs, leaving me managing chronic pain levels on a daily basis.
We all have a story to tell and various negative experiences of life that leave their mark on us in some way or other, regardless as to what background, job or upbringing you have had. It is how we manage the effects of these experiences, whether we identify them in time and accept how they have changed us or whether they are so overpowering that we succumb to the pain and wish for peace.
A key thing to remember is that Mental Illness is very individual and simply because you might think what they are experiencing or is affected by shouldn’t impact them and “is nothing”, does not mean this is the case for them. The point being that everything is relative, if they are in pain, if they are upset or scared and if they don’t know how to handle a situation, YOU have to find a way to deal with and accept that, if you really want to best support them.
It is essential that as a business, you understand the impact that the Suicide of a work colleague can have on the entire workplace. From those closest to them, to those within the same team, their superiors and management, even those who maybe didn’t know them that well, there will be a deep sense of loss, guilt for not recognising the symptoms and embarrassment from the wider community finding out. This can and will impact your business dramatically, from loss of productivity to sick days for those traumatised and this will last for a considerable time. Can you afford to take the risk and ignore this?
It is testament to the hard work and tireless efforts made by so many on a daily basis, that Suicide is at its lowest point for over twenty years within the UK, however, with the rise in Mental Illness cases will this lead to a rise once more? I guess it is a question aimed at each and every one of you out there, especially Men, are you going to take responsibility for your own wellbeing and adjust your thought process where necessary? Prevention is better than cure, so at least gain a better understanding and adopt your own helpful coping strategies AND TALK. #Realmentalk
I am looking for courageous Men to come forward and support an upcoming project that is raising awareness of Mens Suicide and sending the message “It takes a stronger man to talk about their mental health, than to hide”.
You would be willing to appear in a two minute video and share a Mental Health, Stress, Depression and/or Suicide experience that would be sent out over social media. Read more here – #Realmentalk or CONTACT ME
